Category Archives: Sports Profile

Two Recent Football Articles: McDonald & Ball

Image result for david ball fleetwood

Pieces on Neil McDonald (Blackpool) and David Ball (Fleetwood) for the discerning reader…

Neil McDonald:

http://www.itsroundanditswhite.co.uk/2015/06/17/neil-mcdonald-humble-man/

David Ball:

http://footballleagueworld.co.uk/feature-when-fleetwood-let-their-cantona-go/

Feedback welcome.

Jeff Weston

http://www.thesportswriter1.com

Twitter: @jeffweston1970

 

Interview with Lancashire Closed Championships 2015 ‘Senior Singles’ winner, Paul Cicchelli

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On Sunday, 31st May – shortly after 3pm – a red-faced, battle-worn and drenched Paul Cicchelli finally got to sit down knowing that he’d just taken the weekend’s big trophy by turning over Formby’s Jack Dempsey in the ‘Senior Singles’ final (11-13, 11-7, 11-3, 11-6).

Below is the full, unedited transcript of an interview in the immediate aftermath of that victory with Flixton and Crosby High’s chopper extraordinaire…

1) The Lancashire Closed Championships. How do they compare with other championships you’ve played in? A good calibre of player today?

From a county perspective Jim Bolton and Dave Wheeldon did a fantastic job running this event. Remember that this event was only put into people’s diaries in late March and the demand to play was so great they even had a reserve list of players queuing to play in the competition. Graham Coupe always makes everybody feel welcome at his club and even posted pictures of all the players on his Facebook page. I hope that they keep running this tournament for many years to come. My little boy Franco has just turned 1 and he has tremendous hand-eye co-ordination, already able to catch a ball, so who knows maybe he can follow in his dad’s footsteps one year.

2) What I find interesting is the commitment players put in behind the scenes i.e. trying to play whilst still earning money. Of the semi-finalists today (Charles Musa, Thomas Haddley, Jack Dempsey and yourself) apparently Musa does shift work, Haddley is an electrician and Dempsey goes to college (4 or 5 hours practice a day they say). How does this impact a player’s performance do you think?

It’s a valid question. I definitely look at table tennis as a hobby and my release from a stressful targets-lead job so it doesn’t mean as much to me if I lose a game anymore. I work for a telecoms company as an Account Manager looking after 78% of all the NHS Trusts with really clever systems built around speech recognition and contact centre management. I travel about 30,000 miles a year, so really fit in a game of table tennis whenever I can. In the Liverpool League I play for Crosby High School and they tend to give me notice about all the best games that they want me to play in. Dave Graham (Crosby High Head Coach and Team Manager) does a really difficult job in managing multiple players across multiple teams and many of them travel just as much as I do to play a game of table tennis.  I’d much rather travel and play the best players after my meetings than just turn up against the weaker teams to massage my ego and win percentage rate.

3) I have mentioned you previously in articles: “too refined, too canny, arches his body like a yoga teacher, wolfman arms, bejesuses pass his lips, too big in the chops, like observing a craftsman in his shed, the most elegant chop in the game (like rocking a baby), Jekyll and Hide game”. Do you think much has changed in the interim?

Ha-ha, that’s great. At 39 years of age and a body now ‘matured’ on motorway service station meals, I think I am the least likely yoga teacher. Do you know what, I probably cover about 6 miles running, in short sprints when I play a table tennis competition and all I can say is that if there is a ball, whether or not it is a ping pong, tennis or even football I can chase it down all day, but ask me to run 6 miles without a ball to chase and I’m more likely to stop off for a chat on the way; anything except exercise for exercise’s sake.

4) Did you think you had a chance of winning when you woke up this morning?

Do you know what – my draw couldn’t have been harder. My first game after the groups was Martin Ireland who just doesn’t miss against chop and reads spin brilliantly. I lost the first game and could have gone down 2-0 if I hadn’t started attacking every loose shot and forcing Martin to play slightly tentative then I would have definitely lost that match. 3rd round was against Rob Hall, one of the most improved players in Lancashire. He’s physically very fit with an excellent technique and although I won 3-1 (I think) every rally lasted at least 12 shots each, which doesn’t sound a lot, but if you saw how hard he hit the ball and the angles he was finding I certainly put some effort in to win that match. The semi-final was against the best player in the room, no question, Thomas Haddley. We’ve played each other loads over the last year and every match goes to the deciding game. Thomas played semi-pro in Greece a few years back and when he hits the ball, you can literally feel the quality coming from him.  Strangely enough even though Jack Dempsey (who I played in the final) was the highest ranked player there, I sort of look on him as a bit of a protégé. He’s started defending away from the table like me and always asks me for little tips and tricks. I am the Mr Miyagi to his Daniel-son (Karate Kid film reference) so I wasn’t nervous about playing Jack, although he has the chance to be the best defender in the country if he gets his head down over the next few years.

5) Which of the listed 40 or so players did you fear the most today?

Thomas Haddley for the reasons mentioned before. Steve Scowcroft because he has just come back playing over the last 6 months after a 25 year break. When he last played a tournament he was number 8 in the country, and when you consider that this was the glory era of English Table Tennis with Des Douglas (ex-World number 6), Carl Prean (World Quarter Finalist) and Alan Cooke (recent World Veterans Champion), John Hilton (European Champion), Steve played a different level to everybody else in the room. And he’s such a down-to-earth fella, never giving it the ‘Big I am’, which is unusual in table tennis quarters.

6) You’re currently 171st in the Table Tennis England ‘Senior Men’ rankings (Dempsey 157th, Haddley 232nd and Musa 486th). What is the highest English ranking you’ve ever had?

English Mens: 49. Juniors – I could beat the number 2 in the country and lose to the number 222 in the same tournament. I was a bit of a show-off back in the day and wanted to entertain more than put my head down and win without looking pretty. But I had some notable triumphs taking out Belgium’s top Junior at the English Junior Open and being one of the last English players left in the competition. The English Open was the last tournament I played as a junior and even though I had all these wins, they never produced another ranking list for that year.

7) Do you see progression for a table tennis player as league, county, British league and international or something different?

Not quite sure what the question implies here, but table tennis is a minority sport. Even telling my work colleagues excitedly on my weekly catch-up conference call today that I won the Lancashire County Table Tennis Championships, got the immediate question back from my boss, “Hmm but how many people actually play table tennis in Lancashire?” It’s almost like anybody that plays table tennis feels that they must apologise for playing. The sport does have a geeky persona attached to it. You will get some players that will never want to enter a national competition and are happy to play in their local leagues, and others that are the best in their local leagues won’t want to play in other leagues, happier to be the biggest fish in their independent pond. The competition that Jim Bolton runs called the ‘Champion of Champions’ pits every Lancashire league singles competition winner against each other and has a large viewing audience and games are even taped and pushed on to YouTube. This is an excellent idea and I’d love to play in that competition, but Liverpool will never let me enter their end of year competition as with my job I can’t get enough league games in to qualify. Keep up the good work Jim, what about an invite-only competition to selected players from leagues – that could be a winning format.

8) What tips can you offer a junior?

Shadow play – learn your shots in front of a mirror. The Chinese do this and have the best technique around and aren’t even allowed to play on a table until they have the right technique to play, which is probably taking the whole shadow-play thing too far.  I used to walk around the house making table tennis ball noises imagining different scenarios to play against. This might have more to do with me being an only-child and entertaining myself than anything else . I would also tell juniors to practise their serves for at least an hour a week. If you can win cheap points with serves you don’t necessarily need to be on top-form that day, but if your whole game is built around finesse and fitness then a bad night’s sleep, cramped conditions or an unfamiliar table could be your downfall.

9) I noticed that Jack Dempsey’s face fell a little when he realised you’d made the final against him after knocking out Haddley in five sets. Why do you think that was?

You’d probably need to ask Jack that. I play in the same team as Jack and he played Thomas earlier in the year and actually won surprisingly comfortably so maybe he felt he could repeat that? Table tennis is a game of intricate styles and nuances and the way in which different people can play the same shot, with even the same technique can produce completely different spins. I think Jack would prefer to play an attacker than a defender. And in fairness, there’s only a handful of decent defenders in the country and he’s one of them, so running into another at a tournament is actually a pretty unique experience

10) To me the whole face of table tennis needs a boost, a lift, a proper grandstand audience, music and crowd attentiveness – a regional Barry Hearn if you like. How would it feel to top Prem’ players like yourself to have a crowd of 500, not just 100?

As Kevin Keegan would say, “I’d love that!” One of my first jobs after leaving school was doing table tennis exhibitions at the Butlins holiday camps. The exhibition would normally be at the end of the holiday and all the guests would be there to collect their awards and have a drink before leaving the holiday camp. I remember I was at Butlins in Bognor Regis doing the exhibition at the end of their 70s music week. There were hundreds of rowdy guests dressed up like the village people, ABBA, Queen etc and the noise was deafening. I even signed bats after the event and felt like a temporary superstar. I sat in the crowd and let my opponent smash balls at me whilst I pretended to read the newspaper and swerve the ball back on to the table with sidespin from 20 or 30 feet away. Ah good timezzz.

Jim Bolton, and his ‘Superstar’ tournament format, has a chance. We don’t need to play with bats made of sandpaper or change the rules. Just get some players in that will be entertaining, supply a nice room and some alcohol for the spectators and you’re on to a winning formula.

11) When you unavoidably jumped over the table tennis barrier after taking the 3rd set against Haddley and then immediately got cramp in your calf, did it cross your mind that you wouldn’t be able to continue?

Er…yes. My whole hamstring went and I couldn’t bend my leg without feeling like somebody had a knife in my leg. Luckily for me there was a competitor who had just passed her physio exams and she worked miracles. It was pretty embarrassing to hit a winning shot, jump over a barrier and then crumple into a heap on the floor though. My wife says I embarrass her wherever I go, and I can now sort of see why.

12) What had you won before winning the Lancs Closed Champs?

I won a few 2 star competitions as a Junior as well as county competitions in Sussex (where I am from), Cambridge, Suffolk and Kent. I played in a great competition called the British Boys Club Table Tennis Championships and won that 3 or 4 times too. But my trophy I’m most proud of is “Search for a Star” where I had to complete a series of sporting challenges, footballs through tyres, tennis, archery, table tennis, badminton and running. I won everything except the running and archery and I was a couple of years younger than most of my counterparts too. I loved showing off with a crowd in front of me. I got a swish gold trophy and a free holiday for my mum, so she was pleased too.

13) Do you think a full season with Flixton is on the cards again after Ramsbottom wiped the floor with them by 40pts (2014/15)?

Yep, we’re back stronger and tougher. John Hilton is recovering from cancer and will (I’m sure of it) be back this year. We’ve also got Steve Scowcroft and Louis Rosenthal and myself back playing this upcoming season. Any team that has Mick Moir in it is going to be very strong, but Ramsbottom, we’re coming after you next season.

14) Do you think yourself, Steve Scowcroft and Louis Rosenthal would be a formidable team guaranteed the Bolton title?

Yep, but Phil Bowen is also one of the most talented players around, and possibly the youngest looking 60-year-old since Benjamin Button, so don’t count him or Phil Biggs out of taking the big scalps too.

15) How does it feel entering tournaments like this? Is there a thirst, a need to still prove yourself?

Honestly, it was trepidation. I’ve played for the County Seniors since I moved up here some 10+ years ago. I’m definitely putting myself out there to be shot at, and at 39 years of age I’d love to play for the Seniors for a good few years to come. I’m not ready to put myself ‘Out to grass’ in the Veterans yet…

16) What was your most tense moment today?

9-9 in the 5th and deciding game against Thomas Haddley. It was a long point and I chopped one off the floor and Thomas mishit it and it hit the edge of the table. Yep that was pretty tense.

17) What is the difference between the Open Singles and Grade ‘A’ Singles Banded?

Open Singles, everybody can play. Banded Singles is open to everybody except the top seeded players to play in.

18) Did you hit top form today? Good points and bad about your game?

Good points were mental toughness, getting myself back from seemingly difficult positions to win, which I guess is my strength. Weak points are that my backhand attack has now got my tennis technique and that doesn’t lend itself very well to table tennis. Imagine Stan Wawrinka trying to recover in under a second to a return of one of his long backhand drives – it’s not possible. I love tennis and will now play with my mate Roger throughout the summer so maybe that one backhand drive shot that I hardly ever use at table tennis should stay in the locker, for table tennis at least.

19) Do you think TT is in good health nationally and do you see us ever competing with the Chinese again?

The Grand Prix circuit is really good for players that want to rise on the ranking lists, but the cost to enter is astronomical, over £60 just in entry forms and that’s before you take into account travel and possible hotel bills. And the winner may get a couple of hundred pounds or a plastic and glass trophy if they are lucky. (What Steve Scowcroft’s daughter calls a ‘Skimmer’ like a stone you throw into the sea on holiday.) The game needs better marketing, better ideas and decent prize money. The Chinese are the best in the world, but why not stop worrying about the Chinese and concentrate on English Table Tennis being the best spectacle and the best format in Europe? Premiership football proves that if you create a great competition then the world will follow, even if other countries actually have better players than us.

20) Anything else you want to chip in of interest Paul, please do…

Thanks. You’ve done an excellent job in your table tennis journalism in the past and we need more people like yourself pushing the sport and uncovering the stories. Remember table tennis is the most played individual sport in the world. We just need somebody to open it up and give a fresh outlook. If darts can pull in thousands of people spectating then there’s no reason why table tennis can’t. And I think you can see from your chat with other players, there are definitely more characters in table tennis than there are in darts. I couldn’t see Phil Taylor diving over a barrier for a winning game shot and pulling his hamstring, could you?

 

Full results list for Lancashire Closed Championships 2015 from Quarter Final stage:

Senior Singles

Quarter Finals:

J Dempsey beat S Scowcroft

9-11, 11-2, 11-2, 13-11

C Musa beat D Griffith

11-7, 11-3, 5-11, 6-11, 11-7

T Haddley beat S Green

11-4, 11-6, 7-11, 11-5

P Cicchelli beat R Hall

11-8, 9-11, 11-5, 11-6

Semi Finals:

J Dempsey beat C Musa

6-11, 11-7, 11-5, 11-6

P Cicchelli beat T Haddley

8-11, 11-6, 11-8, 5-11, 13-11

Final:

P Cicchelli beat J Dempsey

11-13, 11-7, 11-3, 11-6

 

Junior Closed

Quarter Finals:

A Hussain beat A Dillon

11-9, 11-9, 13-11

M Lennon beat J Parker

11-7, 6-11, 11-3, 11-5

D Olsberg beat J Gilbert

9-11, 11-7, 12-10, 12-10

Z Cantor beat M Laird

11-4, 8-11, 6-11, 11-3, 11-3

Semi Finals:

A Hussain beat M Lennon

11-8, 11-7, 11-13, 12-10

D Olsberg beat Z Cantor

11-13, 13-11, 11-7, 10-12, 11-8

Final:

A Hussain beat D Olsberg

11-7, 11-9, 11-7

 

Junior Banded

Quarter Finals:

R Davies beat J Parker

12-10, 11-8, 11-9

D Olsberg beat J Edmunds

11-7, 11-3, 11-3

O Bendall beat J Gilbert

11-9, 11-6, 7-11, 10-12, 11-6

M Lennon beat C Richardson

11-5, 11-9, 11-6

Semi Finals:

D Olsberg beat R Davies

11-8, 12-10, 12-10

M Lennon beat O Bendall

7-11, 11-5, 18-16, 11-5

Final:

D Olsberg beat M Lennon

7-11, 11-8, 11-9, 11-5

 

Open Doubles

Quarter Finals:

Dempsey&Green beat Olsberg&Cantor

11-8, 11-9, 9-11, 11-4

Musa&Hussain beat Duff&Ahmed

12-10, 12-10, 11-7

Haddley&Scowcroft beat Hall&Renton

13-11, 9-11, 8-11, 12-10, 11-8

Griffiths&Cicchelli beat Pierce&Laird

11-4, 9-11, 11-9, 11-7

Semi Finals:

Dempsey&Green beat Musa&Hussain

7-11, 11-8, 13-11, 11-7

Haddley&Scowcroft beat Griffiths&Cicchelli

12-10, 7-11, 11-7, 11-4

Final:

Dempsey&Green beat Haddley&Scowcroft

11-6, 11-5, 11-6

 

Vets over 40

Quarter Finals:

T Haddley beat C Knowles

11-9, 11-8, 11-1

C Musa beat M Ireland

11-5, 9-11, 11-7, 11-5

S Scowcroft beat S Green

11-8, 9-11, 11-7, 11-5

D Griffith beat G Lennon

11-8, 11-2, 9-11, 13-15, 13-11

Semi Finals:

T Haddley beat C Musa

11-8, 11-9, 11-3

S Scowcroft beat D Griffith

11-5, 7-11, 11-8, 9-11, 11-8

Final:

T Haddley beat S Scowcroft

11-4, 6-11, 11-8, 11-5

 

Vets over 50

Semi Finals:

D Griffith beat N Mooney

11-7, 6-11, 11-13, 12-10, 11-8

S Green beat R Bennett

11-4, 11-6, 11-6

Final:

D Griffith beat S Green

8-11, 12-10, 11-5, 11-6

 

Senior Singles Banded

Quarter Finals:

R Hall beat W Ranton

7-11, 11-7, 11-9, 11-8

N Mooney beat R Assier

11-6, 11-6, 11-8

A Tyson beat M Esro

11-7, 11-6, 10-12, 11-8

M Benjamin beat N Ahmed

11-5, 11-13, 6-11, 11-9, 11-8

Semi Finals:

N Mooney beat R Hall

11-5, 11-8, 11-8

M Benjamin beat A Tyson

11-3, 11-5, 11-3

Final:

N Mooney beat M Benjamin

14-12, 11-5, 11-9

 

Ladies Round Robin                       

Beth Farnworth won the group

 

Junior Girls Round Robin              

Beth Farnworth won the group

 

Faizan Bhura: The Diminutive Warrior

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The names of the Nobel Prize nominees are not revealed until 50 years after the event. This adds a certain fascination to the awards given out. Who did the eventual winner beat? Was he or she up against the cream?

Away from the bookies’ chalk and inside the Swedish Academy papers are passed around and eyebrows arched enquiringly. The initial list is cumbersome – it includes around 200 potential laureates selected by professors, society presidents, previous winners and academy members. This is whittled down to a ‘long list’ of 15-20 preliminary candidates in April and then a ‘short list’ of 5 final candidates in May.

Much rigour and due process takes place and that is before the three months of reading and assessment which occurs in order to prepare reports and discuss the merits of each candidate.

It would be nice to think that similar levels of deliberation and brooding happened prior to and on Friday, 27th March at the pre-Finals committee meeting. Present were officers Alan Bradshaw, John and Margaret Scowcroft, George Berry, Jean Smart and head honchos Roy Caswell and Brett Haslam.

On these shoulders rested the fates of the season’s big-name players – most challengingly who was to be engraved on The Albert Howcroft Trophy for Most Improved Player. Not an easy thing to decide. An algorithm can only churn out an unloved number. It does not factor in personal circumstances, the general feeling amongst your peers and the inevitable politics that prevail.

‘It’s a bit like politics and statistics. Which way do you jump?’ General Secretary Caswell admitted with redoubtable insight into the workings of the loyal few that give up their Fridays. Which way indeed when the list is so strong, so full of games revamped?

Six candidates shone across the five Bolton divisions: Robert Shaw (Div4, from 8 to 42%); Keane Mills (74 to 100%); Nathan Rhodes (29 to 70%); Christopher Boys (Div4, 80% to Div3, 51%); Faizan Bhura (Div4, 72% to Div3, 58%); Ray Isherwood (Div2, 27 to 68%). It was Bhura, however, who impressed the old guard. ‘In the end we all just looked at each other and went for Faizan.’

Science perhaps left at the door, but then in the 4’ 11” Bhura they have made a genuine discovery. ‘I always do rubbish in the [pre-match warm-ups]. I make them think my technique is not good at all and then when the match is ready I pull my socks up and turn my brain into gear. That’s what I do.’

‘A proper kidder,’ to quote Scott Brown. Too dry to read at times, but there with his secret weapon – his consistent forehand.

You can get a thousand sentences from Bhura on the game and how he has tracked its idiosyncrasies from the age of 12 – charming, colloquial passages that reach out and shatter any sense of smoothness. All that matters though is his devotion to table tennis, his 1994 Bolton-born (Indian mother/Zambian father) bones that have lifted this trophy once held by Andrea Holt.

 

‘Mild’ Max Brooks

harry pilling granddad of max brooks

 

Max Brooks knows very little about Rocky Balboa yet skips five times a week – outside, near the back gate. Such rhythmic poise augments his low centre of gravity and remarkable balance. He claims to stand 5’ 6” tall although one suspects that underneath the slicked-back, mountainous hair he is actually 5’ 5.

The grandson of treasured Lancashire cricketer Harry Pilling (himself a dynamic 5’ 3” [pictured]) and professional ice skater Yvonne Rayner, Max has a blood line that almost forcibly places a sporting implement in his hand. After first picking up a table tennis bat at the age of ten, however, he soon lost interest.

Smooth trajectories rarely chart a player’s career. Most of the time it is a rugged path forward – a Snakes and Ladders board – full of pitfalls, hard dice and the odd bit of luck. Max’s serendipity came in the form of Sport England visiting his Tottington school two years later, informing him that he “had some talent for the game”. This neutral observation acted as a stimulus, a catalyst to where he is now.

Awarded the Ralph Palmer Memorial Trophy in early April as Bolton’s ‘Most Promising Junior of the Season’, Master Brooks – still just 15-years-old – took 44 scalps out of 45 in Division Three; his one blemish losing to the Austrian, Bernd Dumpelnik two weeks before Christmas when gifts are traditionally wrapped up in readiness for handing out.

Such an ascent into the annals of Bolton’s history (and indeed Bury’s if you consider his 49/57 win record with Seedfield in its equivalent division) has largely come about not as a result of any fortunate DNA, but rather through the guidance of surviving paternal grandfather, Mel Brooks (now 73). ‘Grampa Mel started me off at Heaton CC. Both grampas have been role models in helping me achieve my goals.’

Max’s approach to the game is surprisingly serene. There is none of the ‘mad’ or mercurial synonymous with such a christening. ‘Mental toughness and never, never give up – play for every point,’ he casually elucidates. Intensity doesn’t ride with the words but instead an internal grit and indomitable belief. It is the same when discussing education (refusing to fuss and be drawn on his favourite maths discipline): ‘All maths I enjoy. It will be what I need when I start work.’

The pragmatic side of him is startling in part – perhaps too clean or manufactured. But then, as Grampa Mel – chief mentor and disciple of Cliff Booth – tells me, returning to the main subject: ‘We spend time discussing strategy and the mental side of the game. He is like a sponge for taking in information, though being his own man he sometimes tries other things.’

Holding the Ralph Palmer trophy is like a ten-year pass to beautiful things – a soft guarantee of climbing the divisions. Big names have gone before Max including England’s Andrew Rushton (1996/97) – had their names inscribed on the silver plate.

A ‘B-game’ is what is required now. ‘He needs to dig short and develop an aggressive backhand block and kill,’ coach Brooks asserts. As for the skipping (3×40) – that will continue.

 

 

Keane Mills: The 100% Kid

dour scot

He has the hard jaw of youth – an almost inert face that gives very little away. After speaking to him, you do not get the sense that he has won anything, but rather lost. There is a bit of the dour Scot in him – a solemn, behind-the-eyes weighing up of events. And yet he is a Boltonian, a successful English lad who has walked through his home town’s 4th division untrammeled and unbeaten.

Keane Mills, 15-years-old and 5’9” tall – a product of the Harper Brass stable (along with team mates Ellis Longworth and Nathan Rhodes) – has done something only two other people have done in recent years: he has gone through a full season without losing. Two extremes of the table tennis circuit seem to cosset such triumph – the Premier Division and Division Four; Michael Moir and John Nuttall earlier beneficiaries of the grandeur.

Mills is a special case though. The title was confirmed on April Fools’ Day when he was still 14 – eight years ahead of 22-year-old Nuttall’s startling achievement in 2012/13. ‘No matter what age you are, you can still match the best,’ he believes and asserts in equal measure – the candour not exactly pouring from him, but offering a rare glimpse of his conviction. ‘I show everyone respect and expect it back and I don’t show my anger as I believe it is a weakness. If you lose your head, you lose the game.’

It is this maturity and precocious flowering which has seemingly led him to where he is now: the recipient of a ‘Double’ in only his second league season (Harper Brass ‘D’ securing the Ron Hindle Trophy days after their title win). Indeed, he claims to have picked up a bat for the first time a mere “two and a half years ago while on holiday” – his exceptional hand/eye coordination obvious to all.

Fellow players around the clubs beat the Mills’ drum. In describing ‘the 100% kid’ a consistent array of words passes their lips: steady; good temperament; right attitude; attacking; patient; level-headed; lots of potential; great serves; focused. These qualities alone cannot have built such a force, an emerging warlord when at the table. They perhaps complement the evident desire and ministrations that exude from him however.

Necessary, critical voices that stray from the consensus point to the young man’s middle game, his unforced errors and also the fact that his mobility seems to be, at times, like a granny reaching for the sweet tray. “He only moves a bit,” one source commented. But what if he only needs to move a bit thus regularly returns to his upright stance whilst flogging the opposition.

Keane is uncompromising: ‘I’m guessing I didn’t move much against this one person.’ The stats bear this out – just two of his 66 conquests have gone to five sets and they were in September. More impressively, he cares. When the title was briefly in the hands of rivals Polonia at 9.30pm on 31st March, he could not bear it: ‘My heart was in my mouth. I thought we had lost it and I was very frustrated.’

 

Duncan, The Diamond and The Lip

aliliston

The stand out, plum fixture of the table tennis calendar’s opening week is Hilton ‘E’ versus Hilton ‘D’. The latter, captained by Andrew Morey, cleaned up Division Two last season yet worries now permeate the camp that ex-player Craig Duncan’s new team will make a mockery of the Hilton ranking system.

Win percentages mostly do not lie. Minh Le (73%), Stephen Hunt (48%) and Morey (81%) can expect the usual dilution of their stats now they are a division higher, however more worrisome is the imminent match on September 3rd versus Division One foes Wilson Parker (93%), Duncan (87%) and Josh Sandford (50%).

If Sandford raises his game and shouts a little less (or more), then this first fixture could be discomfiting for Hilton ‘D’ – a psychological hammerblow just days into the 2014/15 winter season.

Hilton ‘E’ is a team whose combined personalities have not tread the circuit for some time. Rich in horseplay, humour, intensity and steel, its three amigos ask you to indulge them, stand back while the fireworks go off – respect not their antics but the grounded sorcery which they bring to the table.

Duncan, a southpaw, schooled in the French sassiness of Lads’ Club import and coach, Roger Bertrand believes the time is right for an assault. His fleeting appearances in the league – a mere 9 in 2011/12, zero in 2012/13 and 15 in 2013/14 – conceal a wider truth. Although not ‘match fit’, he is hungry, slavering in anticipation of a full season.

The record book shows that his pithy efforts for the soon-to-be enemy were timely and repartee-like. Dispatching Division Two’s finest, Alan Lansdale, Krishna Chauhan and new compatriot, Wilson Parker, Duncan’s form was almost too impressive, ‘rigged’ and ridiculous (symptomatic of a secret training camp). The only black marks were against Ramsbottom ringer, Neil Booth and Meadow Ben’s hard-hitting bull, Philip Calvert.

Duncan last played Morey, Le and Hunt competitively on 10th February 2012 – beating Hunt only. Two and a half years on, his awkward style is expected to pick off all three players – avenging two four-set defeats in the process.

Parker, the youngest member of Hilton ‘E’ at seventeen, yet probably their most serious player is a fine example of how to fast-track a rough diamond. With only two seasons under his belt, his stats are incomparable in the middle divisions: 96% (Div3:2012/13); 93% (Div2:2013/14). Ready now to climb even further, Parker is the face, the consequence of good coaching.

And then there is Sandford – the third wheel in the operation. He reminds you a little of Cassius Clay, the Louisville Lip pre-Sonny Liston half a century ago. He talks a big game, disses the opposition, yet the more you witness such behaviour, the more you realise it is an act of affection.

Sandford cannot for one second drop his guard, his facial gizmos, his play-acting. Even at work you get the feeling his horsing around keeps him sane. He is centre stage – Hamlet, King Lear, Macbeth – yet a different clock ticks inside him when alone.

In his mind he is writing his next wacky script. Sure – most of his words are arbitrary, off the cuff, impromptu, but the core are constructed. He is constructed. Like a clown inside the big top; a painted sneer instead of a smile.

Will he guide Hilton ‘E’ to glory? If the bat is working – yes.

 

Barry Walsh – The Inverse Buccaneer

de Havilland

To look at him now is to miss the man he was. Perhaps in the small, wrinkled canyons which line his face, it is possible to see a sliver of the past, a glimpse of the famous de Havilland Aircraft Company – his former employer – but mainly he is as unrecognisable as the large field and forest that Horwich once was.

Barry Walsh, born in June 1942 – six months after Pearl Harbour – loves three things: history; football; and table tennis. His living room is lined with books about the Second World War – fights at sea, land battles and the prodigious personalities that dominated the era.

He reels off, in a slightly stuttered fashion, a quote from Franklin D. Roosevelt following the destruction of USS Kearny by a German U-boat: “…history has recorded who fired the first shot. In the long run, however, all that will matter is who fired the last shot.”

Such feeling, such inspiration, matters to Walsh. Powerful radio broadcasts, before he even travelled the womb, somehow capture what he represents – what he stands for and looks to uphold.

A former committee member at the Hilton Table Tennis Centre and one of six official key holders, Walsh only recently stepped down. Seven years of ‘letting people in’ was enough. The man always seen on Sundays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays was reducing his outings to just one thus finally retiring in legitimate fashion.

Recent years on the table tennis circuit have led to this moment – his number of matches declining from 72 (2011/12), to 21 (2012/13) to a mere 6 (2013/14); his last victory a season-ending barnstormer against John Lawrence on 6th April 2012 (11-8, 11-8, 11-6). Lawrence twice bowed to the might of Walsh that season, as did Eric Shaw and Bob Waller.

Those days cease to hold much significance for Walsh though. Despite being one half of the uproarious Summer League outfit, the Coffin Dodgers and noted for wearing a fine collection of bob hats and T-shirts at the club, it is the 1950s and 60s that still have him entranced.

Re-awakening memories of his first few years of employment in the engineering sector and his initial rejection by de Havilland, he recalls: “Listen to this. This is what people can do. My brother Clive knew an upstairs guy – one of the bosses. He got me in. Those eight or nine years made me. It was proper engineering. Horwich was a massive place.”

Given the nickname ‘Chert’ from his footballing days, Walsh understood the importance of working for a grand and reputable British aviation manufacturer – its premises built in Horwich in 1937; “part of a group of ‘shadow’ factories constructed in Lancashire, away from the main bombing zone in the south.”

The Mosquito (1940), the Vampire (1943) and the Comet (1949) still fly through the mind of Walsh. They provide succour and compound his great thoughts of Church Road “bomber command” teacher, Mr Worrell.

Aware of his pupil’s eyesight deficiency and the need to wear glasses, Worrell produced the classic words: “Walsh – you’ll have to play at left back.”

From left back to engineering to table tennis, Walsh’s size 7 ½ feet now stand at the crest of a small mountain having been made an Honorary Lifetime Member of the Hilton Centre. For the inverse buccaneer, it is another beginning.

 

Scott Brown – Struggler Extraordinare

struggle

Something in his game reminds you of the divorced man getting married again. There is a kind of amnesia, a joyful, bright-eyed expectation. It is loaded up, stricken with naivety, however.

Scott Brown, Harper Brass’s Division Four no-hoper has the soft, bristled face of a baby gorilla and quite a decamped expression if things aren’t going right. His hands appear to be made out of putty. They are squidgy, nail-bitten affairs – part sausage factory, part heavy duty maulers.

The shots – mostly high-crested loopers – sail in on the other side of the table too gracefully at times, unarmed and full of conciliation. He would rather rally than send someone packing – or so it looks. For a big man, he exudes an extraordinarily high level of politeness in his play.

There is a hint of Neville Chamberlain – a willingness almost to share the points. Whether this ‘Sudetenland’ strategy is tactical, beneath the radar of mortal men, is not clear. Tennis players have been known to adopt similar ‘easing off the gas’ pacing. They have bought themselves valuable time in which to re-energise and really breathe.

The trouble is Brown is a struggler. During his Lads’ Club days in 2011/12 it took four whole months to win just four matches – a miserly 8% win record (4 out of 48); those early conquests – Nikul Ajwani, Kishan Patel, Connor Sutcliffe and Waqas Ali – inscribed in his mind to this day.

Hope comes in many forms though. Strugglers FC Moda, an Ottoman Empire football team founded in 1908 by Istanbul Greeks, finished runners-up in the 1909-1910 season. They were second only to Galatasaray. Sporting blood is in the Brown family – his granddad playing in goal for Lancashire Rebels FC in the 1980s.

Brown too has donned the green goalkeeping jersey whilst at secondary school. Was he good? “I was OK,” comes the unboastful mantra. Getting him to elaborate on anything is difficult. Not because he lacks the wherewithal, but because he is genuinely unassuming – one of the most straightforward and laid back people I have ever met.

Now, 24-years-old, signed by Harper comptroller, Kaushik Makwana in 2012 after ‘outgrowing’ the Lads’ Club, Brown – one senses – is gazing out over a sun-drenched, flower-filled field that no one else can see. His mellow disposition has managed to detach itself from the harshness of those table tennis numbers by which we are all judged: 17% (2011/12), 24% (2012/13), 29% (2013/14).

He is improving. The Scott Brown performance chart without a labelled Y-axis looks half decent. To a private establishment bent on efficiency and big returns, however, his contract would not be renewed.

What of the future? “Been playing penhold since March [2014], but I’m getting little bits sorted then I’ll be pro at penhold lol.”

Such a table tennis grip is traditionally Chinese – difficult to master for most westerners who prefer the ‘shakehand’ style. The wrist moves more freely. The player no longer has a crossover point. Given the shorter reach, players tend to stay closer to the table needing faster footwork and good stamina.

I recall Brown playing quite deep which makes such a move rather odd. Perhaps it’s those flowers again. And another marriage.

 

 

Step into the Barber’s Chair

barber

If you hang around the corridors at Harper Green Leisure Centre long enough on a Tuesday night, you will stumble across a man who claims that Steve Barber is the best table tennis player in England. No medication has yet been found on the said individual, but suffice to say the numbers do not back up such an assertion.

A quick examination of the ETTA’s website reveals that it is German-based, Liam Pitchford – with 4370 ranking points – who currently holds the coveted crown; regular matches for TTF Liebherr Ochsenhausen against the likes of Zwischenstand Dusseldorf’s Timo Boll typifying his week’s work.

Barber, on the other hand – a Bolton TTL Premier player – routinely plies his trade against relative unknowns including Frederic Turban. And his stats over the last three seasons read as follows: 35% (2011/12); 28% (2012/13); 35% (2013/14). One could say Barber is back where he was two years ago but that would be to define him incorrectly.

Rarely seen with a grimace on his face, Barber is representative of everything good about the game. Approachable, allowed out “four nights a week” by his “understanding wife” in order to pursue his mini-dreams and guzzle the odd beer, and firmly appreciative of the nourishment that the Bolton League provides, Barber views life simply yet keenly.

He is symbolic of a certain caste of men who stopped ageing at 29. The wisdom increases and the body continues its inevitable slide, but the boyish longings of yesteryear remain: a beautiful partner; meeting up with friends; a damn good TT session with the occasional clubbing shot.

Upon first meeting Barber, you wonder, you stew momentarily, you question whether anyone, anyone can be so buoyant yet sincere. There is no religious zeal about the man, no upbeat fakery – just an upturned smile; a signal to all that laughs are expected, that humorous observations need to be made.

A Ladybridge regular, one of only six men to play all 66 matches in the Premier Division this season, Barber’s proud Scarlet Letter-like scalps have included Radcliffe’s Michael Dore (44%), Little Lever’s Ron Durose (58%), Radcliffe’s no.2, Robert Hall (60%) and Hilton’s Jordan Brookes (62%).

Asked how he managed to turn over such an array of superior talent, Barber’s modesty rolled before me: “Me and Mick always have a great game. To beat Mick I have to work hard. Rob is a very good player but can easily get frustrated with his own game which he did against me. I beat Ronnie at Ladybridge away from his comfort zone of Little Lever and their table. Jordan’s mind was somewhere else that night (I think).”

After the grit and grind of the Winter League (September–April) comes the somewhat gentler Summer League (May–July) which manages to harness man’s goodwill in a manner which would be inconceivable in the preceding months. A cascading ding-dong of sorts, Barber perfectly captures the essence of two of its entrants: “My old teammate, Johnny Scowcroft after every winter season finishes phones me and tells me I am playing in the summer league with him.”

No switching tracks for Barber (best not mention Heaton). No letting pals down. Just grounded loyalty. A rare man he is indeed. Perhaps the Harper Green fellow was right all along.